I’m sure a few of you are thinking due to my the tone and content of my last few posts that I’ve dropped the grumpy part of this running routine and its all happiness, unicorns and magical running fairies right?
Please, if it was that easy I would have figured out this shit years ago. I have been running much more consistently lately and the happy runs have increased 1000% so about one every three months. I don’t know what happens on the grumpy runs, the music doesn’t pick me up the people on the trail are irritating rather than inspiring (grated I usually hate all people so I don’t know why I would ever find this surprising) and usually I narrowly miss stepping in dog turds. I go home feeling like I’ve wasted an hour of my time.
Sadly I lack a TARDIS to fix it.
Whats worse is when I do get home from my trek to nowhere I am as hungry as the she hulk, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve come home from a run and just started eating crap right from the fridge, and not normal stuff either no I’ll eat a hunk of cheese and deli meat as quick as you please. I don’t’ even like cheese and turkey but apparently running she hulk me does. Not to mention the pain the next day when it feels like my legs have been replaced with bricks. No, let’s mention that. I know you’ve probably gathered that I’m not exactly a little ray of sunshine in the morning, let me tell you on days after I run my normal self looks like a Disney princess.
accurate
Trying to get this butt out of bed after running is a no-go. Even the sweet sweet aroma of coffee brewing upstairs will not compel these legs to move, because they are no longer legs. They are manikin legs filled with cement. Now I don’t want to disillusion you here, running isn’t exactly the only thing that makes me irate. I am not a happy person in general and honestly i have no designs to become more positive about life in general. If fact if you really really want to piss me off the best thing to do will be to tell me to “look on the bright side” or the key “is a good attitude” will send me into a homicidal rage.
Despite my many personality flaws I want to be good at this damn it! Not only do I want to be good at this whole running business it would be nice if I liked it as well. What makes this apparent burning hatred/apathy so frustrating is that I know running can be fun, I’ve had run running. I’ve had fun running more than once. But I get into these funks where no matter what I try my runs and the days after are filled with so much grump I’m surprised I don’t morph into Dr. Cox from Scrubs. Whats worse is I have no solution, other than to keep on trucking and hope that the ratio moves from grumpy to happy.
Basically I’m in need of advice, how to you get over a running slump? Because I’m sure as shit out of ideas.
-TGR
The Grumpy Runner 